Q. Who would win in a fist fight, Barack Obama or Stephen Harper?
A. Well, my underprivileged young peasant. Lets review the profiles:
Obama is clearly the more agile contender and he would be smiling to intimidate his opponent, while Harper boasts a big appetite and overhand right. In this battle of the titans, I see Obama hula dancing around Harper like a butterfly landing jabs, elbows, and a flurry of untamed roundhouses. Since Harper has the weight advantage, he can take most of these punches and kicks. I depict Harper landing one vicious blow to the gut of Obama to stun him and then a massive right. Obama would be on the ground getting curb stomped as if he were one of Stephane Dion'ss baskets of compost, still grinning ear to ear. In a shocker, the CIA doesnt allow Obama to leave the White House without being fully wrapped in Kevlar. So Obama, with his limbo expertise, stands up on his feet and graciously continues to fight.
KING BONDS VERDICT
Easy. Winner by KO 4:53 seconds into the fight, Mr. Barack Obama. This conclusion is based upon simple facts. Obama is a lefty and Harper is originally from Toronto - and is a Maple Leafs fan. Enough said.
This is the verdict cause King Bond said so.
GIVE ME THE INGREDIENTS AND I'LL MAKE THE CAKE.
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